To be a strong black woman you are the most underrated woman in America! Not to discredit any other race of women in the world but given our history, black women are constructed from a very different cloth. Black women have been taught through generations after generations how to maintain their own trials and tribulations, how to take care of themselves as well as others, how to do all of those things and make it look easy.
After listening to countless podcasts and having countless conversations with fellow black women, this very question came to my mind, why are black women taught to be so strong? Being strong for so many years, enduring pain, heartache and still having to take care of everyone around you, are still factors. Yet we as black women are still having a flawless public façade to mask private despair.
During one of the podcasts that I listen to faithfully, this flawless public façade in which black women manage to wear so well is called the black superwoman complex. It is, in fact, the idea that we are invincible and indestructible. There is real pride attached to this complex. Many black women truly believe that being a black superwoman you represent other strong women, suppress emotion, you cannot be dependent on any other individuals, a deep motivation to succeed and put others before yourself! Black women, I am here to tell you that this particular thinking will cause a lot of unnecessary stress.
For many black women, we are constantly depressed, constantly seeking validation from others, constantly having to “settle for less” because people, jobs/careers, or life simply doesn’t align with our standards. We have been told for so long that our standards are too high. Let’s take a stance today and reverse the curse. No longer will we have to hide behind what others have spoken over our lives. We can be strong women, we can have our dream careers, we can have that house, we can own our dream car, vacation periodically, yes ladies, and we can have it all. It’s all about our relationship with God, balance in life, our drive but most importantly our mental health.
God and God alone have made it His business to get you to where you are in life at this point. It’s His Grace and Mercy that has kept so many of us. Seek His face, read His word and give Him all of the praise! I cannot stress enough the importance of mental health. There are plenty of individuals who perceive talking with a counselor or a therapist is “something that white people do”. That’s not true! Seek a therapist/counselor who can help you resolve those unresolved issues in your life and to help you to effectively maneuver through life.
Let’s make it a mission to redefine the definition of what a strong black woman is! It’s imperative for other women of color to know that it is okay to be strong but still seek help when needed. To all my fellow strong black women—may we know them, may we be them!